December 7, 2002

HIDEKI IRABU GOING BACK TO JAPAN

Hideki Irabu, the pitcher immortalized in the Vetivers classic "Jacques Cousteau," has signed a contract with the Hanshin Tigers in Japan, thus ending his American Major League career. Paul was going to try and meet Irabu when the Texas Rangers played at Kauffman Staduim this summer, but the "fat pussy toad" (quote by Yankees owner George Steinbrenner) awoke in the middle of the night with chest pains and was hospitalized, so Paul never got to meet him and give him a copy of his song.

December 7, 2002

FORMER VETIVER JIMMY MARCH IS "IN THE STUDIO"

The former Vetivers guitarist and composer of four songs on the Lights album Jimmy March is working on a solo CD of original material. Paul Solecki is producing the album and providing some instrumentation. Some say that Jimmy is just looking for a creative outlet and just wanting to let his friends and family hear the songs he has written since leaving the Vetivers, but if you really think about it there is something funny going on.

Doesn't it strike you as odd that Jimmy decided to do a CD right after he heard that his former band was doing one as well? And that they will be coming out around the same time? Yes, it is obvious that this is a severe case of jealousy and Jimmy is only trying to be as cool as the guys in the band he once was part of. We always joke about Jimmy being an "old man," and this outlandish behavior certainly seems to be a case of trying to recapture his lost youth. Sort of a midlife crisis, if you will. So beware, Vetivers fans. Beware of boys who cry wolf, keep wide of birds of a feather that don't flock together, and avoid at all costs "Jimmys in musician's clothing."

November 5, 2002

VETIVERS FALL SHORT OF VICTORY IN ELECTION

All three members of the Vetivers lost in the national election today. Despite Paul Solecki's write in votes, Ben Champion is not a member of the US Congress, Paul is not a State Representative, and Clyde is not the State Treasurer. In addition, former Vetivers opening act Steve McClernon also failed to take office as a member of the county commission and fan of the year Bess Price is not on the state Board of Education. While write-in candidates do not usually win, the losses of all of these fine people just seems suspicious to me.

October 18, 2002

BEN AND PAUL MEET THE RED ELVISES

Tonight at the Grand Emporium in Kansas City, Paul and Ben took a break from finishing the upcoming Vetivers CD and saw a concert by and met all three of the Red Elvises. Their motto is "your favorite band," and since they already took that motto the Vetivers had to settle for "not nearly as good as the Red Elvises." Zhenya, Igor, and Oleg performed for over two hours and then got the chance to meet Paul and Ben. There are no plans yet for a supergroup featuring members of the Red Elvises and the Vetivers, but there is always the imagination.

September 12, 2002

VETIVERS COMMISSION AN ARTIST

The Vetivers have pooled all their money ($0) and, in the tradition of the Renaissance's richest men, have commissioned a great master of the arts for the cover of their upcoming CD. Kiel Johnson, who actually likes the band, hasn't rested in the past two days since he learned he got the job. Already, he has come up with 43 different ideas and completed 36 of them.

"I'm too excited to sleep or eat," murmured Kiel, a pencil in his mouth as he stroked another on an outstretched canvas. "This is, and will always be, the most important thing I've ever done. This is what people will remember me by. I've got to get it perfect." Kiel's roommate has already moved out, and his dog Kali is mad at him because there's no place to sleep anymore in his famous warehouse. Every square inch is covered with ideas for the Vetivers. "I hope they like at least one of these!" Since Kiel is the artist, the band is guaranteed to.

August 11, 2002

VETIVERS BEGIN SECOND CD THIS WEEKEND

This Sunday the recording industry reached a new low as The Vetivers begin recording their second album. The band plans to record the entire album themselves using various recording equipment in the Vetivers vault and some borrowed from friends, including former opening act Steve McClernon. Though they have never before recorded a CD entirely on their own, the early analysis is that things are going much better than expected.

July 25, 2002

CLYDE KIM SEEKS FAME OUTSIDE THE VETIVERS AS A MOVIEMAKER

Vetivers bassist Clyde Kim has a new movie available online. Why Wouldn't You Send It? is out at www.localorigination.com under the drama category and has been getting rave reviews from all who were involved in its making! Find out if you agree with them by viewing the movie and then saying how great it was on the Vetivers Message Board.

June 17, 2002

VETIVERS PREPARING FOR SECOND CD

For the past couple of weeks, the Vetivers have been rehearsing and coming up with ideas for what they hope will turn into their second CD by the end of the summer. Ten songs are set to be included so far, with an additional seventeen under consideration. Not all the words have been written and not all the songs are complete, but Paul, Ben, and Clyde hope to top the Lights CD both in length and number of songs.

The Vetivers plan on recording and producing the CD themselves, and hope to have the basic tracks recorded before Ben and Paul go back to school in August. Some of the artwork has already been chosen, but the main layout is still subject to influence from the Vetivers fan(s). If you have any suggestions for the band, such as songs you'd like to be included or something about the artwork, please state your opinion on the Vetivers Message Board.

May 16, 2000

MYSTERY BAND TRIES AND FAILS TO THWART THE VETIVERS

Two days before the Vetivers' fifth anniversary, a mysterious person named Josh called the Cup and Saucer and claimed to be the Vetivers' opening act. He said the Vetivers had to cancel but his band will step up and replace them. That's right-someone tried to sabatoge the Five Year Anniversary Festival! Fortunately, the great people at the Cup called Clyde and the plan of this mysterious Josh character was revealed as nothing more than an evil scheme. The Vetivers are shocked, especially since one of their biggest supporters, Josh Peres, shares a first name with this fiend. The FBI and the Vetiver Intelligence League are investigating the crime and will release details as they come in.

May 8, 2002

VETIVERS ENTER THE 21st CENTURY

The Vetivers are no longer allowing the long distance between drummer Ben Champion and the rest of the band stop them from practicing. The band is now practicing electronically over the internet. Paul is recording new songs in mp3 format and sending them to Ben, who is inventing the drum parts from 100 miles away. There are also plans to convert bassist Clyde Kim into a cyborg, but that will have to wait until the next concert.

The practice mp3s are hidden somewhere on vetivers.com, so if you're interested in hearing what the band is up to before you find out in person on May 18, start searching! Your next mouse click could have you listening to brand new Vetivers material! It's so new that you could even record it and copyright it before Paul has a chance to and possibly get away with it!

May 7, 2002

FAN WILL SKIP TOWN TO AVOID CONCERT

Longtime Vetivers fan and former Fan of the Month Josh Peres has decided to go to spend next weekend in Emporia, KS, to avoid the Vetivers fifth anniversary concert. He also feels that the web site has nothing new. Well, Josh, have you read Tales of The Vetivers or contributed to the Message Board in the recent past? That's right, Josh, there are new things added to this web site all the time, and it is your fault if you can't find them. I hope you have fun in Emporia... I can't even type that without laughing! Let's hope that Josh comes to his senses and leaves a message on the Message Board very soon.

May 2, 2002

VETIVERS TO TAKE THE FIFTH

In mere weeks, Vetivers fan(s) all over the world will mark the return of International Vetivers Day. May 18 marks the five year anniversary of the band, and the nine year anniversary of Carnivorous Grass. To everyone's (Paul's) dismay, there will be no Carnivorous Grass reunion taking place at the Vetivers concert at The Cup and Saucer on the big day due to Jim Kelly's arms falling off.

This will be Clyde's sixth concert with the band, yet he remains the most hated Vetiver ever according to several national polls, which contribute the great animosity towards him not to his inability to play or even recognize a bass guitar, but to his "All Vetivers fans are stupid white jerks" T-shirt he wears every day and his legendary abuse of the band's female fans.

On a related note, former Vetivers guitarist Jimmy March will briefly reunite with the band, making this the third time in the past five concerts he has performed with the band he longs to be in once more but can't afford the dues. Despite the rumors of Jimmy's cameo at the upcoming reunion concert, attendance is expected to go up for this concert on the basis of the old Beatle's line, "Can't get much worse."

April 24, 2002

VETIVERS.COM DOWN FOR ALMOST A WEEK

The universe seemed a little more empty for the past six days after the server that contains all the secret information for this web site crashed. Vetivers fans worldwide felt alienated, and police everywhere were on high alert. Now that the site is back up and running, the tension is starting to subside.

"I didn't know what to do for the past week," commented Vetivers fan Steve Powell through a stream of tears. "Sunday afternoon I wanted to find out the history of the band, but I couldn't because the web site was down. On Monday I wanted to know what the fifth song was at their September 1 concert at The Pub, and I had to wait until this morning to find out that it was 'Caldecott and Newberry.' You're not going to mention that I'm crying like a baby on the web site, are you? Waahhhh!" Well Steve, you can dry those tears, because the web site is back online!

March 25, 2002

VETIVERS, MICHAEL MOORE EXCHANGE AUTOGRAPHS

Tonight in Kansas City, Paul and Clyde of The Vetivers were part of the lucky group of people who got to see legendary filmmaker and author Michael Moore on his book tour. The pair stuck around pretty late to talk with Moore for a few seconds and to give him a free copy of their 1999 CD Lights. Michael Moore was even great enough to ask Paul and Clyde for their autographs in the CD. This was the second Vetiver/Michael Moore encounter, as several years ago in Lawrence former bassist Jim Kelly paid Moore a complement on his film Canadian Bacon.

All the band members have great respect for Michael Moore, and they appreciate his sense of humor and are inspired by his political views. It has long been a goal of the band to give something back to the man who has enriched their lives in so many little ways. Tonight, they may have accomplished that goal, for Moore said he would listen to the CD on the plane tomorrow. If so, The Vetivers would be helping him catch up on all the sleep he's missing on his tour!

March 23, 2002

CLYDE HEADS WEST

Clyde had the honor of meeting one of his heroes today. The Vetivers bassist, along with pal Tim Bauer (who never comes to see The Vetivers), rubbed elbows with Adam West at a comic book convention in Overland Park. Clyde described the former Batman star as "weird" and "strange," but he managed to get another autograph to add to the Vetivers collection! A spelling mistake turned into a great pun, as Mr. West ended up signing his picture to "The Bativers!"

March 13, 2002

NO MORE BEARDS

The Vetivers are officially a beardless band once again, as Paul and Ben have each gone clean shaven in the past two weeks. There have been many rumors about Vetivers bassist Clyde Kim and his lack of bearduocity. Several unofficial Vetivers fan club newsletters have reported Clyde's unwillingness to let his facial hair grow out as a sign of deeper problems in the band. The Vetivers would like to officially go on record as saying that Clyde will express all serious problems the band may have in the future by tatooing his entire back.

Paul and Ben both miss their beards very much, and would like to take this opportunity to wish them well, wherever they are.

February 26, 2002

PAUL GOES SOLO

Following the lead of former Vetivers guitarist Jimmy March, Paul Solecki is going solo this weekend with a performance at Eden Alley on the Plaza in Kansas City, MO. This solo performance will be Paul's first in several years, and he will feature several new songs and even more new arrangements for existing songs for ukulele, accordion, and organ. Hopefully there will be enough security there to prevent the people who are eating from getting too riled up and starting a riot due to the extreme emotions that "rock and roll" brings out in them. We don't want Paul to get a Bill Haley reputation.

February 23, 2002

VETIVERS RETURN TO LAWRENCE, YET ANOTHER BEARD

The Vetivers played in Lawrence, KS for the first time in 3 1/2 years tonight with a live set of rock music at a party at the Sunflower House. The Vetivers took the stage and performed a quick set of their more upbeat songs before the sparse crowd of friends and assorted weird characters who were adventurous to see what that racket was coming from the room downstairs.

This was a historic concert because the majority of the band was sporting beards! Paul and Ben each looked older and more distinguished, while Clyde looked as if he had just stepped off the school bus. Don't worry, Clyde, you'll make it someday! Just keep looking in the mirror and grunting, and eventually you'll have that lush beard you've been dreaming of all your life.

February 14, 2002

CLYDE KEEPING SILENT ON UPCOMING MOVIE PROJECT

Vetiver bass guitar player Clyde Aaron Kim is in production of an upcoming low budget independent film called Silent. The short film, which is loosely based on the video game Silent Hill, is said to have a running time of about twenty minutes and will be available on the Internet for everyone to view. No deals have been made on which Internet site Silent will be playing on. The project is said to be a horror genre movie that takes place in a mysterious forest. Clyde is triple billed on this film as director, writer, producer and actor.

"I have nothing better to do with my life, so hell, why not make a film since reality is just eating my immortal soul away," Clyde commented after biting into some really greasy fried chicken. He also mentioned on how he would like to continue producing films after he was finished with Silent. "I'm working on a film idea called The Undying. I have a basic plot outlined, but I still need to get off my ass and think of an actual story. When I finally figure that out (and when I stop playing all those Playstation games) I'll run it by my co-director/camera man Bryan Ross and who the hell knows what will happen?"

Actors have been hard to come by for the director so he has enlisted friends and people he knows to fill his roles. "I still pay them, just not a lot. The only problem I have with using my friends is that some of them were resistant at first. Actually all of them were. It took me forever to get the three people I got for Silent, so who knows what will happen with The Undying." But worries of his second film are so far in the back burner as he works on Silent's release date which is suggested to be around late March. Clyde informs us that Silent's score is to be composed by Vetiver lead Paul Solecki, provided if Paul ever gets the tracks recorded. "I have faith in Paul, I really do, but yeah, if he doesn't follow through there will be hell to pay." Indeed there shall, Clyde, indeed there shall.

February 2, 2002

PAUL GROWS BEARD

The Vetivers made it official today when they announced the beard of guitarist Paul Solecki, who has been growing it since the beginning of December. Paul joins the ranks of Orson Wells, Jonathan Frakes, ZZ Top, and Santa Claus with his new facial hair. Reports tell vetivers.com that Paul was hesitant about the beard at first, but now it has begun to grow on him. No word at press time if Ben Champion or Clyde Kim will grow one to show band solidarity.

The beard was invented in 537 B.C. by Frederick R. Beard of Tupelo, Mississippi (future home of Elvis Presley, who never grew a beard!). Other historic figures that have sported beards include Bluto, Abraham Lincoln, and all four Beatles.

The Vetivers News Archive